Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Letter Number One

My love,

I haven’t spoken to you in 24 hours now. It may seem crazy to be counting the hours, but I can’t help it. I’m worried. I haven’t slept since Sunday night. I am afraid to sleep. The thought of slipping into dreams, and then that’s the moment that you call or get online and I miss you is just frightening to me.

The past two months were not reality where this deployment is concerned. Yes, I’ve been without you, and that is horrible, but I’ve been able to talk to you throughout the day, text message you and get responses. It’s been as though you’ve been on a long business trip.

And now it’s hitting me that this is real. For 10 long months I’ll be without you. I won’t be able to pick up the phone and call you whenever I want to. I won’t hear your voice first thing in the morning and your voice won’t be the last thing I hear at night.

But worst of all will be the constant fear and worry for your safety. You are in a war zone. People over there wish you harm.

I know you’re a strong, well-trained soldier who serves with other strong men and that you will all look out for each other and keep each other safe so you will come home to me in one piece, alive and well. I know in my heart that the Lord will keep you all safe.

Because He didn’t just bring you into my life to take you back out again so quickly.

Things at home are fine. The kids are happy and going about their days cheerfully. They miss you. Every day when they come home from school they ask me if I’ve talked to you. And today, for the first time since August 21st, I had to say no. David looked at me with surprise in his big brown eyes, and I hugged him close and said, “It’s okay. He’s okay.”

You are so precious to us.

So now it’s been 25 hours. I pray that you are safe. I pray that you’re being well taken care of.

Most of all, I pray that I hear your voice very soon.

I love you, my sweet man.
Your Wife